PHOTO PROMPT © J Hardy Carroll
Blood trickled down her shin where it hooked on the barbed wire fence she climbed over. Olivia ignored it.
Gently she lowered her backpack on the ground, unzipped it, slowly lifting out the gadget sought after by every military unit of the world. A tangle of cog wheels it wasn’t sophisticated, though it was more powerful than any weapon ever created. Olivia regretted the task ahead, but not as much as she regretted inventing it.
She had been naive. Weapons don’t end wars. The human lust for power was insatiable. She had to destroy it. Before it destroyed humanity.
99 words
Written for Friday Fictioneers where the challenge is to write a story in 100 words or less. Hosted by Rochelle.
Click here to read more flash fiction.
A cautionary tale, much like the use of nuclear weapons. Well done.
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I believe the inventor of the machine gun thought his weapon would end all wars because it was so powerful for its time. The same for nuclear weapons. But sadly we will never learn will we?
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The first and the last paragraphs are good. Your writing focuses on Olivia, her character and her situation. I think your story would have been stronger if you’d kept the focus on Olivia rather than trying to describe the technology. It’s a powerful weapon that she wants to destroy – that’s all we need to know, isn’t it?
Is destruction of the weapon going to kill her? How does she feel about that?
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I have to agree with you Penny. My attempt to describe the tech threw the story off track a bit. Could have focused more on her regret on having to destroy her creation, and also regret that she created it in the first place.
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If only others shared her feelings about weapons, the world would be a safer place. An interestingly different take.
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Intriguing. You packed a great story into 99 words. Great .
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Thank you Vivian. Glad you came by 😊
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I liked your take on the prompt!
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i hope she succeeds and survives in the process.
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The last para is so true.
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This reminds me of the life and achievements of Alfred Nobel. Great take.
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I love Olivia’s fearless yet cautionary approach to her task. I would love to know more about her than the tech. Sorry. A good story, nonetheless.
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Glad you enjoyed the story. I may attempt a rewrite just for fun. 😊
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Olivia is wise beyond her years. Good story.
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Smart girl! Welcome to the real world of human nature. 😑
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Dear Fatima,
I fear that while Olivia’s heart’s in the right place, destroying the weapon won’t end the violence. Humans can find endless ways to destroy each other. Good story.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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That’s very true especially in light of recent mass shooting. So sad and tragic.
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